Doing Vs. Being
/I want to open this by saying I am writing this week's article because I need to read it back to myself... and because my officemates asked me to share their message....
It doesn't always have to be about the doing. Sometimes it should just be about the be-ing.
This is how a lot of my conversations with my friends, most of whom are also working moms, have gone lately:
"Hi! How are you?"
The answer has almost always been one word, said with emphasis, eyebrows up, head nodding slowly
"Busy." (head nodding now turns to head shaking...you can add a smack of the lips for dramatic effect....)
Enough said, I guess. It seems we feel defined by our busyness, and busyness is the pervasive quality that describes our work, our weekends, and, I fear, our lives in our homes as well.
We link the value of something to the accomplishment, the completion, the meeting of the goal...however, life in our houses is never done. There are always dishes to be washed, laundry to be done, floors to be swept, and papers to be sorted. Always. And when you are all done with that (ha ha) there are a few windows that are rotting, a gutter that is clogged, and a roof that needs to be replaced. With this mindset we will never be able to sit down, but will rather just fall over in exhaustion.
So, are you waiting for your check list to be done, your hamper to be empty, or your Better Homes and Gardens photo shoot to be scheduled so you can really sit and savor your home? Please don't.
If you are unsure of how to start, just follow the lead of your dog or cat, if you happen to share your home with one....
Be relaxed. Be curious....
You know, just BE.
The reason we own our homes, other than the fact we need to be warm and dry, of course, is to hopefully derive some pleasure and enjoyment out of them.
So, how do we get to the place where we can just be? How can we be sure we are taking time aside from our busyness to be still and enjoy? I believe it comes from the acceptance of imperfection-- imperfection that will be there whether or not we rail against it, whether or not we acknowledge it, whether or not we work our fingers to the bone, whether or not we ever sit still. Being able to sit down, sit still, and just be comes from a place of comfort with the idea that everything cannot be accomplished, experienced, cleaned, organized, nor mastered, and that does not diminish who I am or the beauty of where I live.
Alright, I have to close now because I have SO much to do this afternoon. (just kidding, just kidding...)